The 40-70 Rule: Conversation Starters – Continued 2

A Senior Moment or Something More?

You’ve just stopped by your parents’ house for the second time in a month, noticed that your 70-year-old mother has forgotten the name of a close friend. Is it Alzheimer’s disease or dementia, a senior moment or just a passing phase? More importantly, how do you find out?

Make sure you consider your mom’s history and personality so that you can determine if this is a change. some people have always been bad with names, but if your mom is forgetting a close friend’s name and you notice signs of disorientation, you might say: “Gee Mom, perhaps you should see a doctor and get checked out. I’m sure it’s noting, but it would really put my mind at ease if you’d let a doctor make sure your memory is O.K.” Such a conversation starter focuses on the positive and not the negative.

The Medication Quagmire

When visiting you 85-year-old dad, you see bottles of medication on the kitchen counter, on the bathroom counter and on his nightstand. You wonder how he is keeping all of his medications straight. What do you ask?

It’s good to use humor and, in a situation like this, to assume that he is keeping them straight (innocent until proven guilty). There may be good reasons why some of his medications are in the kitchen (he’s taking them with food), while others are on the nightstand (he’s taking them before bed).

Pointing to a bottle and asking, “How the heck do you keep all these pills straight, Dad?” would be a good conversation starter. If the response includes the reasons you suspected above, then it sounds like things are under control. If, however, he says, “I don’t know. I do my best. I’m not even sure what some of them are,” then the situation probably needs more attention.

If he’s having a problem, talk to him about a pill organizer, which could help him keep his medications better organized: “Dad, I’ve heard about organizers that can help you keep your pills in one place and make it easier for you to keep them straight. Why don’t I check into it?” In addition, one service that Home Instead CAREGivers provide seniors is medication reminders to assist them in managing their daily medications.